Crys, Crystal, Rock, and Mineral (crystalreport) wrote in kingdom_spork,
Crys, Crystal, Rock, and Mineral
crystalreport
kingdom_spork

It's baack!!! Part Two

Title: Organization XIII’s Day at the Mall
Author: Asthetic
Rating: : : :
Full Name (including any titles): All of Organization XIII, mainly Axel, Zexion, Larxene, Demyx, Marluxia, and Roxas, as well as a Mary Sue for each of them (excluding Larxene)
Full Species(es): the Bodysnatchers: these creatures take the Nobody skins of the Org XIII members and parade around as them
Hair Color (include adjectives): Presumed canon, except for the Sues, which have weird hair colors like lavender and blue
Eye Color (include adjectives): Presumed canon
Unusual Markings/Colorations/Physical Features: none, except for the Mary Sues. One of them has a fire tattoo on her hand, which Axel falls instantly in love with…
Special Possessions (if any): Clothes that Xenmas would have never allowed them to wear, cell phones, cars, need I say more?
Origin: the depths of Canon hell
Connections To Canon Characters: Axel left his wallet in the mall and someone stole all their identities, I swear!
Special Abilities: In 358/2 Days, there’s a bonus game where you can use Organization members to shop in the Mall that Never Existed. Tasks range from finding magical sitar strings in the instrument store to finding a girl in the mall that matches that member’s personality. For example, an emo girl for Zexion, a DDR queen wannabe for Axel, etc.
Other Annoying Traits: The fact that they attract Mary Sues like flies to honey.

I Say/Notes: If you thought the first part was bad, wait until you see this part. At least it doesn’t have a lot of grammar problems.

First part in case you missed it

 

Roxas finds an emo song by 30 Seconds to Mars, which the boys sing to. They arrive at the mall and park their cars and Zexion’s horse. *ker-snip*

“This place is huge,” mumbled Marluxia. Zexion began walking, but turned back around seeing the rest of them were still staring at the building.

Axel: *as himself* OMG, it’s a mall. I have never seen one in my entire existence. Non-existence to be exact.

Demyx: *as himself* It’s such a pretty building. The architecture’s very modern.

Marluxia: *as himself* I’m hungry.

Roxas: *as himself* How did we get here by car if the World that Never Was is a completely separate world?

Zexion: *as himself* Don’t ask questions! I need to sign your souls away to the God of the Alternate Universe!

“It’s not just for show,” He told them, and began walking forward towards the entrance. The rest followed him into the building. It looked more extravagant then it did outside. People were bustling loudly in shops, browsing, buying, working. They continued following Zexion until he turned around. “Go on and browse. But, meet back at eleven at the food court.”

With that he walked away and into a shop. Larxene didn’t hesitate to start looking around. She began at the very first clothing store called American Eagle and started browsing through the different clothes shown throughout. Axel was walking with Demyx and Roxas, strutting down, looking at the stores. Axel was specifically attracted to one store that had caught his eye. He walked into a store called Hot Topic, seeing a variety of clothes, action figures, anime, and gothic people in the store.

*suddenly, Psycho violins*

Axel: NOOOO! Not that place!

Demyx: My mind! It’s going away with my already missing dignity!

Roxas: *hides under seat*

Zexion: I’m going to my happy place; I’m going to my happy place….

Marluxia: Darn you, Hot Topic! Darn you all to heck!!!

Roxas followed him in, looking all around him, noticing Demyx had left them.

Demyx: Thank Darkness, I’m not going there.

Axel: Roxas?

Roxas: Yes, Axel?

Axel: Kill me when this is over.

“Hey guys,” A skinny, female store clerk said, “Looking for anything specific?”

“Not at the moment,” Axel told her, while he was browsing through posters of bands and movies. “Thanks though.”

The clerk nodded, and continued on with setting racks up with new clothes. Roxas found a wall filled with rings with different designs on it. Oddly, it attracted Roxas and he picked on off the wall, studying it. It had a heart-a-gram engraved on it with vines around the heart-a-gram. Roxas, surprisingly, loved the band HIM and brought the ring up to the clerk. She smiled at him sweetly. She looked around his age, sixteen at least. Her hair was brown and had a black bow that was used as a sort of headband.

“So did you find everything you needed?” She asked him, scanning the rings barcode in.

“Yeah, pretty much,” Roxas replied, smiling back at her.

“That’s good. That’ll be…2.30,” The clerk told him. Roxas pulled out his wallet which was once a plain orange wallet. It had been scribbled on with Axel’s signature, his signature, quotes, etc.

Axel and Roxas: *speechless*

Zexion: Boy, the Akuroku fangirls are going to have a lot of fun with that sentence.

Axel: Just because we share wallets does NOT insinuate that we’re in love with one another!!

Roxas: Axel, we don’t have wallets, much less sharing them.

Demyx: *as Axel and Roxas* Haven’t you heard? We’re wallet buddies!!

He pulled out three bucks, noticing he did not have change on him. She took the three bucks and put them in the cash register, and took out a nickel and two pennies. She gave the change to him and gave him a bag that had his HIM ring in it. She leaned forward onto her elbows, putting her chin in her hands. “So, what’s your name?”

Roxas hesitated for a moment. He had never actually had a real conversation with a girl that wasn’t important.

Roxas; *as himself* Yes, I only talk with members of royalty and/or celebrities. Now, go away.

But, little did he know that a familiar red headed pyro was watching his every move.

Axel: slfka’s;kg!!!! Not again!

Roxas: Will the innuendo never end??!!

“C’mon Roxas,” Axel whispered, “Don’t choke.”

“M-my name’s Roxas,” Roxas told the clerk. The clerk smiled.

“Cute name,” She said. Roxas felt himself blush. The clerk laughed but just out of how cute he looked. Roxas was anxious to know her name, but wasn’t sure if it would be rude to ask her. “My name’s Rixxy.”

Zexion: *takes out checklist* Weird name? Check. Name with an x in it? Check. Sudden infatuation with one of the main characters? Check. Everyone falling for her charms? Check. Yep, bonafide, 100% Mary Sue. *puts away checklist*

Demyx: You have a list??

She held out her hand for him to shake. He took her hand and shook it gently. She continued smiling. As she bared her pearly white teeth,

Zexion:… Perfect features of face? Check.

Roxas smiled back thinking she was very, very pretty. Axel, who was watching from behind a rack of t-shirts, was impressed with how smoothly Roxas was going.

Axel: *as himself* Smooth…like molasses.

“So, do you come here often?” She asked. Roxas shook his head.

“First time here,” He told her, wondering if that was a bad thing or a good thing.

Demyx: It’s a bad thing. Trust us.

Roxas; Demyx, I know that! That’s a clone! It’s not me.

Axel: You always have to remind us every single fic, don’t you?

Roxas; BECAUSE THAT’S NOT ME!!! *zapped for capslock abuse; Mr.Capslock is not amused*

“Well, then I guess I’m honored to be the first clerk to help you.”

“How’d you…”

“We’re by the entrance,” She pointed to the door that Roxas and the rest of the members had entered into. “I saw you come in with some of your friends. Then you came in here with your other…”

Roxas: *as himself* Sora?! Where? I’m saved!

Marluxia: I think the Keybearer left you to suffer a slow and painful death.

Roxas: *mopes*

Axel felt himself slip on a headband. He slipped onto the black, stone floor, making Roxas and Rixxy turn around to see the red headed man on the floor.

Demyx: *as Rixxy* Look at the red-headed man on the floor! Let’s laugh at him!

Everyone besides Axel: *laughs*

Axel: I have a name, you know.

He mumbled a curse under his breath and looked at Rixxy and Roxas. Quickly, he jumped to his feet, picking the headband up and putting it back up onto the rack. Roxas slapped his hand onto his face, it leading down slowly in embarrassment. Rixxy laughed though, thinking it was funny. Axel now blushed.

Axel: We CAN’T blush! We’re Nobodies! We DON’T have feelings!!!

“Sorry,” He said, very…like Axel. “Just slipped.”

“It’s okay,” Rixxy said, still laughing, “I thought it was funny, actually.”

She looked back at Roxas, who had his head down, punching his forehead lightly with his fist. She stopped him by bringing his fist down.

“So what’s your friend’s name?” Rixxy asked Roxas. Roxas looked back up and saw Axel who was spying on him turn around and pretend to browse.

“That’s Axel,” Roxas told her.

“Got it Memorized?” Axel said in a high pitched but quiet voice, having his eyes on the rack with baggy pants.

Axel: Hell to my earlier proposition, Roxas, kill me now before I lose anymore of my dignity.

Roxas: Okay! *takes out Oblivion and Oathkeeper and starts whacking Axel on the head*

Axel: OW! HEY! WAIT! ACK! *and other more noises of pain follow*

Zexion: Surprisingly, I am suddenly…appeased.

Demyx: *points to screen* Wait, the Fourth Wall is about to speak!

The sporker decides to spare Axel any more humiliation and cuts out the rest of the conversation between Rixxy and Roxas. All you really need to know is that Roxas asks Rixxy out for a date. *rolls eyes and snips*

Axel: *rubs head, which is now encased in bandages*

Roxas: Well, looks like you’re saved from an early death, Axel. *smirks*

Axel: *glares at him* How you are my friend in canon I will never understand.

“Hey, hey, hey!” Axel said, catching Roxas’ attention, “Wait for me!”

Marluxia: You’re up next, Zexion.

Zexion: *twitches*

Zexion was busy at Waldenbooks, browsing through different books. He stood in the fantasy novels section, seeing a book labeled “The Hobbit” on the shelf. He took it out of the shelf, reading the back summary of it. Interested, he walked around with the book in his left arm. He came upon many other books, but only found that “The Hobbit” was the one that interested him.

He buys the book. How exciting. *ker-snip*

Zexion turned and walked out of the entrance of the bookstore with his hands in his hoodie pockets. He wasn’t fond on going to the mall with the other members, but someone needed to keep an eye on them. He took out his book from its bag, skimming through the pages smoothly. It was a nice thick book that would be great to read. But, before he could really think about it, a big man with his friends ran into him, knocking him over and dropping his book. The guys laughed irritably at Zexion and continued walking. Zexion, who was just getting happier by the second, went to go pick up his book.

Zexion: *as himself* Yes, I love it when people knock me down. It’s my favorite thing in the world.

But, he noticed another hand going down to get it. A pale one with black and white bangles, and black nail polish. He looked up seeing a young woman with long black hair picking his book up. She handed it to him thoughtfully. He took it gently out of her hand.

Axel: *points at screen* It’s the Emo fangirl! Run away, Zexion!

Zexion: *is horrified* Are they going to pair every single one of us with a Mary Sue?

Marluxia: *fake sighs* Apparently.

“Umm…thanks,” He old her.

Axel: Okay, Zexion, STOP HITTING ON GIRLS WHO ARE YOUNGER THAN YOU.

Zexion: Well, you hit on guys who are younger than you. *smirks*

Axel and Roxas: IT’S NOT LIKE THAT!! *keyblade and chakram Zexion mercilessly*

Demyx and Marluxia: *inch away from the fight with frightened looks on their face*

She smiled a little, nodding in reply. She dressed a lot like Zexion, all in black and white. She had purple eyes that Zexion grew fond of quickly.

“No problem,” She told him. She held out her hand for him to shake. “My name is Yomi. You are...?”

“Zexion,” The Cloaked Schemer told Yomi, gently shaking her pale hand. She smiled sweetly once again, making Zexion smirk.

Axel: *as Zexion* Oh Vexen! I brought you another subject for your experiments! :D

Vexen: *pops out of nowhere* Another subject, really?

Axel: Vexen, I was kidding.

Vexen: *pouts and teleports out*

Roxas: *points at place where Vexen was* Can he do that?

“So, you’re reading The Hobbit?” She asked him, staring down at the thick book. Zexion had in his hand.

“Y-yeah,” Zexion said, “Have you read it?”

“I’ve read the entire Lord of the Rings series,” She told him, laughing a bit. Zexion seemed surprised. Aside from him and Vexen, he didn’t now anybody else that read as much as him.

Zexion: I think they forgot about Lexaeus. He reads the occasional Russian novel, might I add.

Axel: In the fangirl’s mind, there is no such person as Lexaeus. I am surprised that she knew the existence of Vexen, though.

*a portal opens and Axel is whacked on the head with Vexen’s shield, before the portal closes again*

Axel: HEY! I was just saying the truth!!

Especially Lord of the Rings books. Not only had she read the entire Lord of the Rings series, but she was a girl. A girl that was almost as dark as him!

Zexion: *peers at screen* Um, I have no heart. I am composed of darkness. I think dark thoughts of darkness. Sorry, Miss Goth is not as dark as me.

His jaw dropped a bit, until it was lifted back up by Yomi with her finger. “Surprising?”

Zexion shook his head.

“N-no! No not at all,” He said, flustered. “I’ve never met anybody that had read as much as me.”

“Really?” Yomi said, tucking her long black hair behind her ear. “What a coincidence then. I’ve never met anybody other than myself that has ever been as interested in books as I am.”

Roxas: Yeah, because the people who just randomly hang around Waldenbooks are not obsessed with reading at all.

Axel: They’re all holograms, meant to trick you so you’ll never escape!

Zexion, for the first time in a long time, laughed.

“I guess we have something in common then,” He said, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Well, it was nice meeting you, Zexion,” Yomi said, “I guess I’ll catch you around.”

She began walking away from Zexion until she heard him running up to her.

“Wait! Yomi!” He called. Yomi giggled silently to herself.

“Yes?” She said. Zexion had never been this into a girl in his life.

Zexion: *chokes on air* Say WHAT?!

Axel: Ooh, Zexion, you’re in LUUFFFF.

Zexion: *La-lexicon!*

“Do you want to…to,” Zexion stopped and thought. Would asking a girl to walk with him ruin his reputation?

“Walk with you?” She completed. Zexion nodded lightly. Yomi smiled again at the navy blue haired boy. “Of course.”

Wow, Zexion thought, did I just ask a girl out?

Zexion: Okay, when you ask a girl out, you tell her “Oh, let’s go get coffee at the nearby Starbucks” instead of “Let’s walk together !!eleventyone1!!”

Demyx: And you would know this…how?

Zexion: *glares* I’m not telling you.

Marluxia was walking around on the second floor, seeing all of the shops passing by him. One store, filled with decorated paintings caught his eye and he walked in. They were small portraits, some big, and some very big. He came across one that had a great variety of flowers on it; from roses to lilies to irises. It was small, but it was big enough to fill Marluxia’s flower appetite. He looked on the back of it, seeing the price was 13.00. He shrugged and walked up to the cashier who was reading a magazine silently, till he saw Marluxia walk up.

“Find everything to your convenience?” the clerk asked, taking the portrait. Marluxia nodded as he paid for the portrait. “Thank you for coming.”

Marluxia smiled and waved his hand, walking out the door. He sat down on a bench, gazing at his new flower portrait. It was beautiful, with its colors and sort. He took a rose out of his pocket, almost like magic and sniffed it lightly.

Axel: *as Marluxia* To protect the world from domination! Team Rocket, go off with the speed of light, surrender now or be prepared to fight!

Marluxia: *Sa-scythe!* Sing that again and I shall make your non-existence instantly miserable.

A young woman sat down next to him on the bench going through her little handbag. Marluxia glanced at her once, but then moved his head to get a better look of her. She had brilliantly lavender colored hair, with a daisy clip holding back her bangs. Marluxia melted. She glanced at him as well, smiling sweetly.

“H-Hi,” Marluxia said.

Axel: Well, that was a lackluster introduction.

Marluxia: Hey, I have no experience with women. *pauses for a moment* Except Larxene, but she’s a different matter.

Larxene: *portals in* Oh yeah, Mr.-I-was-originally-designed-to-be-a-girl?? *kunais him and portals out*

Rest of Group: *speechless*

The young woman blushed slightly.

“Hello,” She said nodding her head slightly.

“M-my name’s Marluxia,” Marluxia told her offering her his hand to shake. She accepted it, shaking it gently.

“I’m Clarisse,” She told him, a packet of what appeared to be candy in her separate hand. She opened the package and pulled out a purple candy that looked hard. She put it in her mouth, sucking on it in the back her mouth. “Would you like a Violet?”

She held the package up a little, offering the candy to Marluxia. He smiled, not only because it was candy but because it was named after a flower.

“Sure,” He accepted. Clarisse popped one of the purple candies onto his hand. Observing the candy, Marluxia popped it into his mouth, noticing it wasn’t a regular candy. “This isn’t regular candy, is it?”

Axel: *as Clarisse* No, it’s poison.

Zexion: Children, remember to never accept candy from strangers.

Clarisse shook her head gently, but maintained her smile.

“It keeps your breath fresh, though,” Clarisse said, blowing her breath a little into Marluxia’s face. It smelled like an actual violet. “See?”

Marluxia nodded, enjoying the fact that he was actually near a girl.


Zexion: …because most of the time, he was around a bunch of guys.

Marluxia: Look who’s talking! You hang around most of the time with…guys as well.

Axel: *puts arm on Marluxia’s shoulder* Wow. Greatest comeback ever.

Marluxia: *Sa-scythe!*

Axel: OW! Jeez, if you guys hit me enough, I swear I’ll get brain damage.

Zexion: Really? *holds lexicon with evil smirk*

Axel: *scoots away* I was joking. It was just a stupid joke, sheesh.

“It tastes kind of like perfume though,” He said, sucking on his piece of candy. Clarisse laughed.

“Good,” She said, “It’s supposed to. If it didn’t I’d be jipped.”

Both she and The Graceful Assassin laughed.

Roxas: Okay, is anyone else scared that this woman is talking with a “Graceful Assassin” and is having the time of her life?

*everyone raises their hands*

Roxas: That’s what I figured.


 
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